So finally back in Minnesota, I spilled the beans to my mom. (Story: A few years earlier, I was home for the summer. We were all together and my little brother said, "You know, mom and I pray before bedtime....that Kristin will get a BOYFRIEND." Everyone laughed and so did I. It was funny at the time and, yes, I am thankful for her prayers that are definitely unceasing. But when I told her about my new boyfriend, I don't think he was exactly what she had in mind. She was...concerned...and so was my dad...and sister too, actually, understandably. I know that once you become a mother, even when your baby is still inside you, you are constantly in a state of worry. Sometimes it wanes and sometimes surges, but motherhood, from what I gather, creates worry warts. :) But I see it as an expression of their love. She loves me enough to question and loves me enough to be cautious. And my dad too. And sister too.
I talked to Eric on Skype every day and texted him throughout the day. I actually think it was good to have those weeks apart. It forced us to just talk and figure out how to communicate with each other, which can be difficult. Even though we both grew up speaking English, we speak different kinds of English. (Which can be frustrating but, believe me, also makes for some funny stories. :)) But we're still learning about that and making it work. Anyway, back to the story... Again, our story is not really conventional. He was telling me that he loved pretty quickly. I think I actually told him not too :) because I just wasn't ready for that and I wasn't ready to say it back. Well, one day we were talking on the phone (July 25, 2012 to be precise...I had to ask Eric, he knew. :)) and we started talking about the man that stole his tuition money. If you don't know what I'm talking about...read PART 1. He was telling me that he was actually still in contact with this man. I was like, "Whaaaat? You actually talk to him? Why would you want to talk to the man that stole all your money and made you basically homeless?" He went on to say that in his men's Bible study, they were studying Joseph. He said that Joseph's brothers took him, threw him in a pit, left him for dead, sold him as a slave, and Joseph forgave them. He said, "This man didn't do any of those things to me. He didn't try to kill me. He just took my money. He caused to me come to Moscow and hear the Gospel and to meet you. How could I not forgive him? I told him that I was thankful for him. I thanked him for what he did." I was like...*facepalm*. :) I still really can't believe that answer. What an amazing display of humility and forgiveness and wisdom. I started crying I think, just listening to him talk and then I said those three little words that he was waiting here. Yes, I told him, "I love you, Eric." Actually that's four words. :) I was expecting some sort of reaction but right after I said it, I heard nothing. I said, "Hello?...Hello?...Eric??" I didn't know what happened! The call failed or signal dropped. I don't know. But I tried calling him back 20 times! Trying to reach him. He finally answered and I was like, "What happened?? Did you even hear what I said?" And he said, "Yes, sweetheart, I did. And that's why I'm crying right now." I made him cry. Awwww. :) He was actually at the grocery store with a friend and the friend was wondering why he was crying.
After that, I just sort of knew that this relationship was real and was definitely headed towards marriage. I wasn't about to tell my parents that. :) I knew that most people weren't ready to hear that. I kept it to myself but...just knew. I remember when my friend, Sarah, was talking about her, then, boyfriend. She said, "I think this is the man that I'm going to marry." I was like, "Saaaraaah. You can't know that quickly. You just started dating." And then I thought to myself, "She's crazy." But it happens, I guess. I think it's kind of funny that I happened to be in a relationship that moved quickly. I remember silently (and maybe not always so silently) scoffing at those twitter-patted girls that "just knew." But here, I am. There I was, and I just knew.
I flew back in August and my parents had met him over Skype. It went well, although I had to translate their Englishes to each other. Eric was incredibly sweet. Met me at the airport with flowers. I think one of the most encouraging things for me was seeing the reaction of our mutual friends when they heard we were dating. Seeing them be genuinely happy for us, made me feel better and that, no, I'm not crazy. :) So over the next couple months, we dated and fell in love and all that... :) And in November, we started to seriously talk about engagement. I had to explain how my culture does it. He needed to ask for my dad's blessing. Which was scary for us both. :) Not that my dad is scary at all! But I just knew that they were still unsure about the whole thing. My sister put it the best way when she told me, "We hardly get to see you so we don't know much of the little things about who you really are right now, the changes that you have been making and what is happening with you, what God is doing. And when we do see you we hear about these HUGE choices and changes. Once we get used to one thing you tell us, the next time we talk there is another thing. That's part of it. That's part of the "freaked out" thing. Not that we are mad but that, to us, things are happening very suddenly, while for you, living in this relationship everyday, with the little things and the special things and the jokes and talks, things may be happening slowly and deeply."
She's so wise and I love her. But it's true. They didn't get to see to progression of our relationship. They heard that we were dating, then that we were serious, and then that he wanted to ask me to marry him. Which is no one's fault, it's just the reality of this kind of relationship. I've just decided that they will have to just pay catch up when he comes to the US. They will love him so much but it will take time.
So, he decided to call my dad and ask. And yes, I knew all about it. I wasn't with him or anything but I knew. He was home and called and updating me on facebook chat. He called...and my brother answered, bless his heart. He couldn't understand Eric. :( Eric asked if it was Joel and Alex said yes or Eric thought he said yes and Eric started talking and went on and on and Alex didn't say anything. Eric waited...and Alex didn't say anything and then hung up!! (haha. it's funny now but not at the time.) Eric was understandably upset. Alex wrote to me on facebook too and said, "I think Eric just called." I was like, "Ummmm YEAH. He wanted to talk to DAD." I had to explain to both of them what happened and that if Eric calls again, to give the phone to dad. And I told Eric, forgive Alex, he didn't know what to do and to call again, that everything would be ok. Whew....So Eric called again and was able to talk to my dad. Meanwhile...my brother was typing to me on facebook. "What are dad and Eric talking about??"..."I don't know, Alex. I think they're going to Skype soon. You'll know then."...."Oh....I think I already know." :) I really do wonder what Alex thinks about all this. Really thinks. Because if I ask him he'll say something like, "I dunno. It's cool." Eric had a Skype date with my parents later that week, which he called his "interview." He passed and got the job. Meaning, they gave their blessing. Which, I know they are still worrying but I think they just decided to put their trust in me, and Eric, and most importantly, God. That he will guide us and direct us.
So, from then on, I knew it was coming, but I didn't know when. He had mentioned that he wanted to ask me at church in front of everyone. The next day was Sunday, but he didn't ask. On Friday, I wanted to go to Bath and Body Works. It's only at one mall and I told that was the plan for Friday. We were both really hungry when we got there and went to TGIFridays. There was a wait of about 30 minutes. We decided to wait which upset Eric. He said, "How can they just make us stand here and wait? People are hungry." He usually doesn't complain so I thought that was weird. He seemed a little fidgety but nothing too abnormal. There was a food court upstairs and he kept saying, "Let's just go upstairs and get KFC." At this point, we had been waiting 20 minutes or more already and I was starting to get upset from his complaining so I said, "Fine let's go upstairs. I'm trying to have a nice dinner with you but fine. Let's get KFC." So I begrudgingly go upstairs and as soon as we get up there he stops and says, "No....No. We can't eat up here. Let's go back." I was like, "Whaaaaat? You just made us come up here and now you want to go back down?? Eric. No. We're going to eat up here." yes, I was hungry and yes, I get cranky when I'm hungry. So I started towards KFC and I can hear him behind me, "No, let's go back down. We can't do it here. It's not dark and personal." I was, again, like, "Whaaaat? What are you talking about? Personal? I'm hungry. Let's just eat." He insisted and we went back down. At this point, we weren't talking very much. We were just standing there waiting for our names to be called. We finally got a table and ordered. While we were eating, I asked him, "What will you say when someone asks, 'How did you come to know the Lord?'" Because someone will ask him that went he comes to America. I just wanted to get him used to the way we word things. Christianese, if you will. He told me his testimony and about coming to Moscow and how he was thankful that he was able to meet me and then he started to say all the things that he loves about me.
Then he says, "I want to spend the rest of my life with you....Kristin...wi-,"...and that's went I interrupted him.
"Eric, wait."
"Wait? Wait, what?"
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing. I'm talking."
"Ok, ok. Continue."
"Ok so, Kristin I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
"Eric...wait. Are you really doing this right now?"
"Doing what? I'm just talking with my baby....Kristin, will you marry me?" (Pulls out my beautiful ring.)
*gasp* "Yes! Yes I will." And then I immediately thought about the big burger that I ate and all the sticky sauce all over my hands. He put it on my finger and it got all sticky. But it was beautiful, like I said. We immediately had to Instagram it. :)
I was overwhelmed with the immediate love and support from the people around us and from the people around the world. I was walking with my friends and Eric somewhere and remember thinking, "I am so incredibly blessed. My heart is so full of love right now. I think my heart might burst."
We still have a long and hard year ahead of us. First, he needs to get his American visa so he can come in July. The date of the wedding is July 27, 2013. But, unfortunately, the visa processing times vary and it could take longer. We are praying for a miracle. This will all be in God's timing. He has been with us throughout the past year and will see this through to completion. I sent in the initial paperwork. Right now that is in California sitting on someone desk, waiting to be looked through and approved. Once that's approved, information will be sent to the American embassy in Cameroon and Eric will start the next step, his interview. So that means, he will have to fly home once we get word that the first part has been approved. We don't know when that will be. It could be soon. It could be 5 months from now. We are continually praying that it will be sooner. But I told him, as long as he's there on the 27th of July, I'll be ok. Of course, we will be flexible and patient as I hope the invitees and wedding party will be too. We are both very excited and thankful for what the Lord has done and looking forward to seeing Him work in the upcoming months. Please be praying for us during this whole process! We need it. :)
I talked to Eric on Skype every day and texted him throughout the day. I actually think it was good to have those weeks apart. It forced us to just talk and figure out how to communicate with each other, which can be difficult. Even though we both grew up speaking English, we speak different kinds of English. (Which can be frustrating but, believe me, also makes for some funny stories. :)) But we're still learning about that and making it work. Anyway, back to the story... Again, our story is not really conventional. He was telling me that he loved pretty quickly. I think I actually told him not too :) because I just wasn't ready for that and I wasn't ready to say it back. Well, one day we were talking on the phone (July 25, 2012 to be precise...I had to ask Eric, he knew. :)) and we started talking about the man that stole his tuition money. If you don't know what I'm talking about...read PART 1. He was telling me that he was actually still in contact with this man. I was like, "Whaaaat? You actually talk to him? Why would you want to talk to the man that stole all your money and made you basically homeless?" He went on to say that in his men's Bible study, they were studying Joseph. He said that Joseph's brothers took him, threw him in a pit, left him for dead, sold him as a slave, and Joseph forgave them. He said, "This man didn't do any of those things to me. He didn't try to kill me. He just took my money. He caused to me come to Moscow and hear the Gospel and to meet you. How could I not forgive him? I told him that I was thankful for him. I thanked him for what he did." I was like...*facepalm*. :) I still really can't believe that answer. What an amazing display of humility and forgiveness and wisdom. I started crying I think, just listening to him talk and then I said those three little words that he was waiting here. Yes, I told him, "I love you, Eric." Actually that's four words. :) I was expecting some sort of reaction but right after I said it, I heard nothing. I said, "Hello?...Hello?...Eric??" I didn't know what happened! The call failed or signal dropped. I don't know. But I tried calling him back 20 times! Trying to reach him. He finally answered and I was like, "What happened?? Did you even hear what I said?" And he said, "Yes, sweetheart, I did. And that's why I'm crying right now." I made him cry. Awwww. :) He was actually at the grocery store with a friend and the friend was wondering why he was crying.
After that, I just sort of knew that this relationship was real and was definitely headed towards marriage. I wasn't about to tell my parents that. :) I knew that most people weren't ready to hear that. I kept it to myself but...just knew. I remember when my friend, Sarah, was talking about her, then, boyfriend. She said, "I think this is the man that I'm going to marry." I was like, "Saaaraaah. You can't know that quickly. You just started dating." And then I thought to myself, "She's crazy." But it happens, I guess. I think it's kind of funny that I happened to be in a relationship that moved quickly. I remember silently (and maybe not always so silently) scoffing at those twitter-patted girls that "just knew." But here, I am. There I was, and I just knew.
I flew back in August and my parents had met him over Skype. It went well, although I had to translate their Englishes to each other. Eric was incredibly sweet. Met me at the airport with flowers. I think one of the most encouraging things for me was seeing the reaction of our mutual friends when they heard we were dating. Seeing them be genuinely happy for us, made me feel better and that, no, I'm not crazy. :) So over the next couple months, we dated and fell in love and all that... :) And in November, we started to seriously talk about engagement. I had to explain how my culture does it. He needed to ask for my dad's blessing. Which was scary for us both. :) Not that my dad is scary at all! But I just knew that they were still unsure about the whole thing. My sister put it the best way when she told me, "We hardly get to see you so we don't know much of the little things about who you really are right now, the changes that you have been making and what is happening with you, what God is doing. And when we do see you we hear about these HUGE choices and changes. Once we get used to one thing you tell us, the next time we talk there is another thing. That's part of it. That's part of the "freaked out" thing. Not that we are mad but that, to us, things are happening very suddenly, while for you, living in this relationship everyday, with the little things and the special things and the jokes and talks, things may be happening slowly and deeply."
She's so wise and I love her. But it's true. They didn't get to see to progression of our relationship. They heard that we were dating, then that we were serious, and then that he wanted to ask me to marry him. Which is no one's fault, it's just the reality of this kind of relationship. I've just decided that they will have to just pay catch up when he comes to the US. They will love him so much but it will take time.
So, he decided to call my dad and ask. And yes, I knew all about it. I wasn't with him or anything but I knew. He was home and called and updating me on facebook chat. He called...and my brother answered, bless his heart. He couldn't understand Eric. :( Eric asked if it was Joel and Alex said yes or Eric thought he said yes and Eric started talking and went on and on and Alex didn't say anything. Eric waited...and Alex didn't say anything and then hung up!! (haha. it's funny now but not at the time.) Eric was understandably upset. Alex wrote to me on facebook too and said, "I think Eric just called." I was like, "Ummmm YEAH. He wanted to talk to DAD." I had to explain to both of them what happened and that if Eric calls again, to give the phone to dad. And I told Eric, forgive Alex, he didn't know what to do and to call again, that everything would be ok. Whew....So Eric called again and was able to talk to my dad. Meanwhile...my brother was typing to me on facebook. "What are dad and Eric talking about??"..."I don't know, Alex. I think they're going to Skype soon. You'll know then."...."Oh....I think I already know." :) I really do wonder what Alex thinks about all this. Really thinks. Because if I ask him he'll say something like, "I dunno. It's cool." Eric had a Skype date with my parents later that week, which he called his "interview." He passed and got the job. Meaning, they gave their blessing. Which, I know they are still worrying but I think they just decided to put their trust in me, and Eric, and most importantly, God. That he will guide us and direct us.
So, from then on, I knew it was coming, but I didn't know when. He had mentioned that he wanted to ask me at church in front of everyone. The next day was Sunday, but he didn't ask. On Friday, I wanted to go to Bath and Body Works. It's only at one mall and I told that was the plan for Friday. We were both really hungry when we got there and went to TGIFridays. There was a wait of about 30 minutes. We decided to wait which upset Eric. He said, "How can they just make us stand here and wait? People are hungry." He usually doesn't complain so I thought that was weird. He seemed a little fidgety but nothing too abnormal. There was a food court upstairs and he kept saying, "Let's just go upstairs and get KFC." At this point, we had been waiting 20 minutes or more already and I was starting to get upset from his complaining so I said, "Fine let's go upstairs. I'm trying to have a nice dinner with you but fine. Let's get KFC." So I begrudgingly go upstairs and as soon as we get up there he stops and says, "No....No. We can't eat up here. Let's go back." I was like, "Whaaaaat? You just made us come up here and now you want to go back down?? Eric. No. We're going to eat up here." yes, I was hungry and yes, I get cranky when I'm hungry. So I started towards KFC and I can hear him behind me, "No, let's go back down. We can't do it here. It's not dark and personal." I was, again, like, "Whaaaat? What are you talking about? Personal? I'm hungry. Let's just eat." He insisted and we went back down. At this point, we weren't talking very much. We were just standing there waiting for our names to be called. We finally got a table and ordered. While we were eating, I asked him, "What will you say when someone asks, 'How did you come to know the Lord?'" Because someone will ask him that went he comes to America. I just wanted to get him used to the way we word things. Christianese, if you will. He told me his testimony and about coming to Moscow and how he was thankful that he was able to meet me and then he started to say all the things that he loves about me.
Then he says, "I want to spend the rest of my life with you....Kristin...wi-,"...and that's went I interrupted him.
"Eric, wait."
"Wait? Wait, what?"
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing. I'm talking."
"Ok, ok. Continue."
"Ok so, Kristin I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
"Eric...wait. Are you really doing this right now?"
"Doing what? I'm just talking with my baby....Kristin, will you marry me?" (Pulls out my beautiful ring.)
*gasp* "Yes! Yes I will." And then I immediately thought about the big burger that I ate and all the sticky sauce all over my hands. He put it on my finger and it got all sticky. But it was beautiful, like I said. We immediately had to Instagram it. :)
I was overwhelmed with the immediate love and support from the people around us and from the people around the world. I was walking with my friends and Eric somewhere and remember thinking, "I am so incredibly blessed. My heart is so full of love right now. I think my heart might burst."
We still have a long and hard year ahead of us. First, he needs to get his American visa so he can come in July. The date of the wedding is July 27, 2013. But, unfortunately, the visa processing times vary and it could take longer. We are praying for a miracle. This will all be in God's timing. He has been with us throughout the past year and will see this through to completion. I sent in the initial paperwork. Right now that is in California sitting on someone desk, waiting to be looked through and approved. Once that's approved, information will be sent to the American embassy in Cameroon and Eric will start the next step, his interview. So that means, he will have to fly home once we get word that the first part has been approved. We don't know when that will be. It could be soon. It could be 5 months from now. We are continually praying that it will be sooner. But I told him, as long as he's there on the 27th of July, I'll be ok. Of course, we will be flexible and patient as I hope the invitees and wedding party will be too. We are both very excited and thankful for what the Lord has done and looking forward to seeing Him work in the upcoming months. Please be praying for us during this whole process! We need it. :)
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